Okay.... so life has certainly been interesting the last few weeks. For starters, it's Christmas time, and that means that this choir director has been very busy. The Kaleidoscope Children's Choir & the KCFC Youth Choir sang at Crown Center last Friday night. Tons of fun! The children looked beautiful in their concert black attire with the red sparkly vests.... We had a whole lot of fun, and there were SO MANY people there from our church supporting us. As the children were coming down the escalator to go to the choir risers to perform, they were single file, and people were applauding the fact that the Kaleidoscope Children's Choir was on it's way! Too funny... and really neat. The children did a marvelous job, as did the youth choir. Amanda even hit the high A at the end of "Sing Noel!" Wonderful! Goosebump moment.
After we performed our concert, Don, Dyan, Meg, Christian & I had dinner at Fritz's. They have a theme that is all about trains. There is a giant train out front, and inside, they have a train that brings you your food, and goes around on a track all the time. Christian loved it..... Too fun!
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Last Sunday, Don & I went to the Chiefs game.... and froze our patooties off! I cannot remember when I have been that cold! It took my legs about 4 hours to thaw out! Wish I would have remembered to bring a blanket to the stadium.... and we lost by 1 pt. That really sucked. Par for the course, this year....
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I still love my Chiefs.
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I've been experiencing severe depression the past several months. Been in a funk that I can't seem to get out of. I've had really scary thoughts... and finally went to my doctor today. She changed my "happy" pills. Tomorrow I start on Cymbalta. We'll see how it goes. Perhaps I should just build a bridge and get over everything! I mean, why should I be sad all the time? I have EVERYTHING I ever need... a good husband & friend, great daughters, wonderful son in laws, a wonderful grandson, a good car, food, a nice house... so why should I be so sad? Well, I have no idea.... that's the puzzlement. We are learning to live life in a new way because of Don; I'm an empty nester after living my life for my kids for so long; my mom is gone and I miss her so much; I don't seem to have a focus in life right now; I'm perimenopausal, and think I'm losing my mind! All of these things add up together. I'll be alright, though.
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I'm really hoping that this year, for Christmas, that Dyan & Jory & Christian come to our home for the Christmas Eve party. I hope that Scott & Jenny & Chase also come.... It's been such a long time since I've had my own daughter here on Christmas Eve, and I miss that so much. They've always spent Christmas Eve with Scott, so that they could open their gifts. But this year, he postponed that since Jenny & Jeremy won't be able to be there... So, I really, REALLY hope that they all come to my house instead. I'd love it so much, and I know that Dyan misses coming here too. I hope and pray it works out this way this year.
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Ugh... it's supposed to be an ice storm tomorrow. Sheesh.... I'm getting quite tired of the snow & ice already! Enough already!
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And that's my life so far.
4 comments:
And what am I?? Chopped liver?? LOL...
You will be fine, you're strong. One of the reasons why I look up to you. :-)
I love you! Hope you like your christmas present!
Chopped liver??? awwwww, of course you're not chopped liver, silly willy! You are ALWAYS at our Christmas Eve party, and I love that! I love that you and Drew always come over. I was just saying it would be really nice if for once, Dyan & Jory & Christian could also come over. I just naturally expect for you to be there.... and I'm so grateful.
And I look up to you too! I wish I had your butt! It's so dang cute!
HOW ABOUT AN UPDATE?!?
WHAT IS GOING ON IN LIFE?!?
Get anything special for Christmas?!?
I know you are out of town, but I am sure you are checking your e-mail. :-)
Depression is an illness just like any other. If you had a blood disease or diabetes, lupus or anything else, you wouldn't wonder how that could happen when all the exteriors in your life were going well. I do hope that you are getting treatment from a doctor who specializes in depression. Far too many primary care physicians pass out anti-depressants but have little formal training in dealing with matching the correct one to the patient, achieving optimum dosage and managing side effects. Cognitive behavior therapy is an important part of recovery as well. Are you receiving that?
Best of luck. Take care of yourself. But don't be in denial and think that you can just snap out of it because you are strong. That just sets you up for a guilt trip and a further sinking into depression.
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