It's a New Week

It's a new week..... thank God for that! Literally. The past week has been very difficult for me. Last Friday, I was spiraling out of control, depression taking over, and there was a battle between me, Satan and the Lord taking place in my bedroom. I spent the majority of several hours in prayer, asking for help from the Lord. And pleading with Him for strength and to not cave in to wanting to take a bunch of pills and go to sleep forever. It was a tough day. And I couldn't think of ONE person I could call and seek help from. I didn't want to worry my girls. I didn't want to worry my husband, or give him an extra burden that day. Finally, the Lord put Emily on my mind and I called her. I reached out to her and she was there for me. I love Emily, and am grateful for her. She & her husband will be helping Don & me.

What instigated this? The IRS. They are after us now. We were audited a few years ago on 4 years worth of taxes, and they had thrown out ALL deductions from those years. Just plain old tossed them out. Then when we (Don) protested it, he met with the IRS investigator and provided proof of all of our deductions. He has boxes of receipts and proof. Still, we didn't hear from her in a long time. Then on Friday we got letters saying that for 3 of those 4 years, we now owe the IRS a six figure amount of money in 2 weeks time. Whoa......... spinning out of control. Don says not to worry, that we have the proof. In my mind, I'm thinking, "How much more can we be expected to endure from our Federal Government??? How much more in this life are we expected to endure????" Then Don went back to work, and I spun out of control.

Emily's husband is an attorney, and is finding us a good tax attorney that we can trust. Hopefully we'll hear something today. I'm just so sick of all that Life has thrown us these past few years. I know that the Word says that He won't give us anything in life in which we cannot endure thru His strength. I'm leaning on this promise, and trusting Him to guide us to the right attorney, and to see us through this new trauma in life.

I am so grateful for my husband. He came home from work early on Friday and was VERY worried about me. He loves me unconditionally and without end. He reassured me that everything would be alright (crying as I'm typing this) and that we'd make it through this. We have the proof, after all. Then he had me clean up and he took me to dinner down at Buca's. Love that place. We had a delightful time. We sat at the bar, talked with the bartender and people around us, and enjoyed a nice spaghetti dinner. LOVE that garlic bread, unfortunately.... oy...

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Saturday morning was another rehearsal for the musical. I had the "3 crows" come first so I could teach them the choreography to their dance. Then the 2nd hour was the crows with the other characters in their scene - Scene 3. Good rehearsal. What a great cast we have this year. Well, we always have a good cast. 'Cause we always have such great kids involved! Love them.... I do.

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Saturday night was the first of Family Dinner Nights at our house. We used to do this when our kids were little, and Don wants us to start doing this for our kids. We used to go to Don's parents house in Calif. every Saturday night for burgers. That way we got to see them, and they got time with our girls. Fun times, fun memories. So, we're starting that in our family. And any of the kids who can come are welcome to, and if they don't want to come, or have other plans, then that's okay too. But for now, we're starting Family Dinner Night on Saturdays. Dyan & Jory had other plans already, but Meg, Drew & Kenzie came over. We had burgers & watched a stupid Guy Flick - Ironman. It was stupid with NO plot, but the guys & Meg liked it. Ridiculous, I say. But, we had a nice time together, and I even made chocolate malts. Yum.... after our burgers & baked fries.

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Sunday - church. I felt alone at church yesterday. Don't know why, but I did. I felt disconnected. Must be the depression talkin'. I don't usually feel that way. I sat alone. I felt alone.

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Sunday after church, we came home, had sandwiches, and then got on the Harley. It was a bit chilly, but with our leathers on, we were fine. We rode to Dyan's so she could cut Don's hair. They we took off to the Plaza (my favorite place in KC). We parked in the semi-designated bike parking area, where all motorcyclists park, then took off the chaps & leather jacket, stored it in the bike, then walked to J. Jill, and I shopped. I shouldn't shop when I'm having bouts of depression.... $300 later, I got some good deals! Lots of sale items, and I needed new clothes, since mine are either stained or worn out. I put it on my JJill charge, so will pay it off in a month. I felt good about my purchases, except having to buy size 20 jeans. I have no jeans in my closet, and really needed a pair, so I had to order them online, from the store, so no shipping charges, and I absolutely HATED having to buy 20's... but, I hopefully won't be in them long. I just needed some jeans to wear "in the meantime." Oy.....

After J Jill, Don & I went to the Cheesecake Factory and had a slice of cheesecake and a glass of iced tea. Yum.... I know, I know, I've totally BLOWN my diet this weekend. Back on the plan today! I swear! Honest!! I have to find my yoga DVD. It's been put in my office, I'm sure.... Gotta find it and get back to it.

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Today is KenzieDay. She's such a little dollface. She's rolling all over the place now. And this morning, she ate a whole bowl of organic oatmeal. Yes, "organic." LOL She's taking her morning nap now. I've never seen a baby so easy to put down for a nap. She's wide awake when I put her in the crib, and we turn on her music toy, and she goes right to sleep! Amazing! I need to take new pics of her and post them. She's really getting big!!! She's almost 7 months old now.

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New Week = New Attitude. I can do it! I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me.

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And that's my life so far...